Ben's Adventure

Once Ben Franklin was at a friend’s house. “I believe that - wait for it - Bald is beautiful, Baby!” said Ben. He said that because he was in a house full of people wearing wussy powdered wigs. Then he left. He let a dog follow. When he got home, his wife said, “Zounds, Ben! A dog? Hey, he jumped on the bed!” she said madly. “Good, he’ll keep us warm on these harsh winter nights!” Ben said as he fell asleep. The next day his wife said, “Why do I itch?!” “I believe the dog is the culprit,” said Ben, “He who sleeps with dogs wakes up with fleas!” he continued. (Oh, by the way, that last thing Ben said is a famous quote.) Then he got in the shower, hearing little flea shouts. When he got out he went for a walk. After a few hours he decided to go home. Before he got home he was slapped and put into a bag! When he woke up he was on a ship. His friends were steering it! They said, “Ben, we have to show you an island we found.” “Okay, but did you have to do it so meanly? I mean, you could have slapped me less hard!” said Ben. When they got there, the island was HUGE! But it was different. The trees were shaped in a square! So they got out and explored! But the ship moved back to sea because they didn’t have anchors back then. Back in the forest Ben said, “Hey look in that tree!” He climbed up and grabbed it. Then the branch broke. Ouch. That must have hurt. “Oh, by the way, we shaped the trees into squares,” one of Ben’s friends said. That would have been nice to know. The thing was a map! It showed where a treasure was! So they went to dig it up. It was full of gold coins! And a lot of other stuff too, like a crown, a staff, and even golden tinker toys! On the treasure it said it used to belong to Leonardo de Vinci. Then they took it to where the ship was. “Hey! Where’s the ship?!” they said. But then Ben’s friends saw it two miles away, and then jumped into the sea and swam after the ship. But Ben didn’t. He wasn’t stupid. Then he made a hut and a fire. Then he found some tropical fruit and ate it. Then he thought up a name for the island. He called it Hawaii. It is called that to this day. Then it got dark and Ben fell asleep in his hut. The next morning he heard something. It was a monkey! Then the monkey took the golden staff and pressed the jewel on top and a path appeared and stretched across the sea. The monkey went with Ben across the huge bridge. Ben kept the monkey as a pet. He named it Coconut. They finally made it back to America.

This story is fiction. Don’t go thinking Benjamin Franklin discovered Hawaii, now! Hope you liked it, you monkeys!